April 1, 2025

62-The Deadly Connection Between Intimate Partner Violence and Suicide Risk With Jessica Maerz

62-The Deadly Connection Between Intimate Partner Violence and Suicide Risk With Jessica Maerz

The devastating intersection between suicide and domestic violence remains largely hidden, yet the statistics tell a shocking story. In this deeply important conversation, LCSW Jessica reveals that one in three women who attempted suicide in the past year were recent victims of intimate partner violence.

Drawing from her years of experience working with suicidal individuals, Jessica unpacks how the risk factors for suicide directly mirror the experiences of domestic violence victims. The isolation, hopelessness, and psychosocial stressors created by abusive relationships establish perfect conditions for suicidal thoughts to take hold. Most alarmingly, research shows the window between having suicidal thoughts and taking action can be as brief as five minutes to one hour.

We explore the generational impacts as well, discovering disturbing international data showing children who witness domestic violence face significantly higher suicide risks. In the U.S., one in fifteen children are exposed to intimate partner violence annually, with 90% being eyewitnesses to abuse.

This episode provides crucial information about recognizing warning signs, creating effective safety plans, and understanding what happens during crisis intervention. Jessica emphasizes the importance of direct communication, explaining that asking someone specifically about suicidal thoughts doesn't plant the idea – it opens the door for life-saving conversation.

Remember the crisis line number: 988. 

References:

Suicide and intimate partner violence

New study explores intimate partner violence as precursor to suicide - UNC Gillings School of Global Public Health

UNC Gillings School of Global Public Health, April 11 2022 discussed this study: Intimate partner violence victimization and perpetration as precursors to suicide - ScienceDirect

Intimate partner violence, suicidality, and self-harm: a probability sample survey of the general population in England - PMC Lancet Psychiatry, 2022 Jul; 9(7)

Scale of homicide and suicides by domestic abuse victims revealed content

Resources:

Homepage | Zero Suicide

Tools for Addressing Intimate Partner Violence and Suicide Risk: Lessons Learned from OHA’s COVID-19 Emergency Response for Suicide Prevention Grant

1 in 3 is intended for mature audiences. Episodes contain explicit content and may be triggering to some.

Support the show

If you are in the United States and need help right now, call the national domestic violence hotline at 800-799-7233 or text the word “start” to 88788.

Contact 1 in 3:

Thank you for listening and please remember to rate, review & subscribe!

Cover art by Laura Swift Dahlke
Music by Tim Crowe

Chapters

00:00 - Introduction to Suicide and IPV

04:25 - Risk Factors and Statistics

09:33 - Impacts of Isolation on Victims

15:49 - Children, Witnessing Violence, and Suicide

31:44 - Warning Signs and Safety Planning

38:59 - Crisis Response and Getting Help

45:28 - Time-Critical Nature and Key Takeaways

Transcript
WEBVTT

00:00:00.840 --> 00:00:03.869
Hello, little sister, also known as Jessica.

00:00:03.869 --> 00:00:05.251
How are you doing?

00:00:06.200 --> 00:00:07.306
I'm fine, Ingrid.

00:00:07.306 --> 00:00:09.329
Thank you for having me on your podcast.

00:00:09.960 --> 00:00:12.308
Thank you so much for coming on my podcast.

00:00:12.308 --> 00:00:22.870
I've been wanting to have a professional and you actually happen to be a professional right at my fingertips, so that's very kind of you to take your time to join me today.

00:00:23.471 --> 00:00:23.972
You're welcome.

00:00:23.972 --> 00:00:24.402
I didn't know.

00:00:24.402 --> 00:00:28.643
I had a choice, you didn't.

00:00:29.204 --> 00:00:32.673
But I still am going to be gracious and say thank you.

00:00:32.673 --> 00:00:40.534
So today we're going to talk about suicide and its links to domestic violence, slash intimate partner violence.

00:00:40.534 --> 00:00:50.189
So before we get started, I'd like for you please, to give just a bit of a background on your experience with suicide.

00:00:51.451 --> 00:00:57.383
Okay, well, first of all, I'm a licensed clinical social worker in the state of Florida and Texas.

00:00:57.383 --> 00:01:28.141
I have had my LCSW for 14 years I think roughly maybe and in my, the majority of my experience with suicide has been with active duty, military and veterans, and probably about a total of almost seven years of working with suicidality, and so I would like to say I'm a subject matter expert on that.

00:01:30.165 --> 00:01:33.754
It's weird for my little sister to be a subject matter expert on anything but.

00:01:36.103 --> 00:01:37.046
I'd have to agree with that.

00:01:37.105 --> 00:01:43.605
So just could you explain what an LCSW is and what those qualifications are, just to everyone knows.

00:01:44.206 --> 00:01:46.433
Sure, it's a licensed clinical social worker.

00:01:46.433 --> 00:02:11.311
You have to have a master's degree in social work and then, depending on the state requirements, you either have to have two years or three years of clinical supervision and you have to pass a national exam to be able to be a licensed clinical social worker, which means you can provide therapy, you can diagnose pretty much everything that a psychologist can do, except for some psychological testing.

00:02:11.992 --> 00:02:14.025
Okay, so definitely very qualified.

00:02:14.025 --> 00:02:15.729
Thank you All right.

00:02:15.729 --> 00:02:20.472
So let's start talking about suicide and domestic violence.

00:02:22.401 --> 00:02:29.061
I was able to obtain some statistics for you, and one of them the number, you will find interesting.

00:02:29.061 --> 00:02:38.502
One in three women who have attempted suicide in the past year and this is from 2021, was a recent IPV victim.

00:02:41.806 --> 00:02:42.889
That's insane.

00:02:42.889 --> 00:02:45.091
That is, that's a crazy statistic.

00:02:45.091 --> 00:02:46.834
Quickly, ipv.

00:02:46.834 --> 00:03:06.931
I know I've talked about it before, but since we're using abbreviations, I like to update just in case this is somebody's first time listening to this up to this podcast ipv intimate partner violence is what that stands for, and I also have the links to all the resources if you need them or if anyone wants them that's perfect.

00:03:06.931 --> 00:03:11.847
I'll put those in the show notes for sure references, not resources.

00:03:11.947 --> 00:03:18.502
I also do have resources, so quick, it doesn't say that article didn't say like how recent did it?

00:03:19.163 --> 00:03:27.936
because I guess the article was written in 2022, so I believe the stats were taken from 2021 and 2020.

00:03:28.400 --> 00:03:32.008
But it says that one in three is a recent.

00:03:32.008 --> 00:03:33.772
They were a recent victim.

00:03:33.772 --> 00:03:34.883
It doesn't say like how?

00:03:34.943 --> 00:03:35.204
recent.

00:03:35.204 --> 00:03:36.288
Oh I see, no, it doesn't.

00:03:36.860 --> 00:03:42.780
Because I guess technically they can be at risk for forever really right.

00:03:42.800 --> 00:03:44.144
That's actually what I'm going to.

00:03:44.144 --> 00:03:52.931
I do have some of the risk factors for suicide uh are coincide a lot with uh victims of ipv.

00:03:52.931 --> 00:04:13.312
Some of the risk factors uh a history of mental health um substance use, impulsivity, hopelessness, isolation, access to lethal means, psychosocial stressors, which could be financial housing anything to an abusive partner well, yes, I'm getting to that.

00:04:13.312 --> 00:04:13.612
That's.

00:04:13.612 --> 00:04:24.646
That's in a little bit um employment, you know, um legal, and then relationship stressors, which is a very nice way to say part of an abusive partner.

00:04:24.646 --> 00:04:30.004
Toxic relationships, no relationship with family.

00:04:30.024 --> 00:04:40.803
Yeah, so that covers every aspect of domestic violence, so the legal, the financial, the psychological, emotional.

00:04:40.803 --> 00:04:41.384
It doesn't, does it say?

00:04:41.384 --> 00:04:42.146
Did you say physical?

00:04:42.146 --> 00:04:44.028
I did not say physical.

00:04:44.170 --> 00:04:46.173
Okay, well, I'm sure this is going to play into it too.

00:04:46.173 --> 00:05:19.040
But I mean the victimization is associated with anxiety, depression, ptsd, fear, concern of safety, physical injury, which you did mention, and some of the risk factors for experiencing IPV, either as a victim or a perpetrator because I wanted to talk about suicide and perpetrators as well includes substance abuse, alcohol dependence, the social isolation, history of abuse, whether it be as a victim or a witness of parental IPB, and they also all those correlate with suicide as well.

00:05:19.040 --> 00:05:22.485
So there's a lot of risk factors.

00:05:23.687 --> 00:05:31.755
And it makes sense because, as a victim of domestic violence, you're stuck in this situation where you feel alone.

00:05:31.755 --> 00:05:40.031
So the isolation and there's hopelessness.

00:05:40.031 --> 00:05:52.911
Be alone, because one of the things that perpetrators or abusers do is attempt to isolate you, either physically or all those other things you listed financially and socially, whatever.

00:05:52.911 --> 00:06:06.680
So it makes sense that you begin to think that there is no other alternative to escape from your reality other than consideration of suicide, exactly.

00:06:07.423 --> 00:06:09.749
Exactly, there was also.

00:06:09.749 --> 00:06:11.334
So I know that a lot.

00:06:11.334 --> 00:06:12.898
Sometimes sorry I just jumped.

00:06:12.898 --> 00:06:23.124
Sometimes when you kind of think of suicide and IPV, you think of murder-suicide and that is actually pretty rare.

00:06:23.124 --> 00:06:35.740
It's less than 2% of the suicides from the available research I found, and so a lot of the research that has been done has been focusing on the murder-suicide aspect of it.

00:06:35.740 --> 00:06:42.660
So unfortunately, the data out there this is the most recent data that I found that is out there.

00:06:42.759 --> 00:07:09.908
But more studies are being conducted and there was also actually in the UK there was a police force, the National Police Chiefs Council, and they're doing a study on suicide and domestic violence to better train their police officers when they respond to a situation and they listed an analysis which came out last year on March 13th and the key findings from the report.

00:07:09.908 --> 00:07:11.132
I found this pretty interesting.

00:07:11.132 --> 00:07:18.430
There's a total of 242 domestic abuse-related deaths were recorded between April 22nd to March 23rd.

00:07:18.430 --> 00:07:34.954
There was 93 suspected victim suicides following domestic abuse, 80 intimate partner homicides, 31 adult family homicides, 23 unexpected deaths which they did not clarify what that meant.

00:07:34.954 --> 00:07:54.452
This part's a little sad and four quote unquote other deaths which are individuals that live with the family but were not family members, like a friend being at the home which recently in Central Texas there was a murder-suicide of a spouse and her friend in the home.

00:07:56.583 --> 00:07:58.129
I actually know the statistic.

00:07:58.129 --> 00:08:01.646
I think it's about 20% of intimate partner violence.

00:08:01.646 --> 00:08:14.014
Homicides actually involve other individuals outside of the victim, like family members, neighbors, people who intervene, law enforcement officers or even bystanders.

00:08:16.161 --> 00:08:19.507
There was some other data that I got from this report that I also found interesting.

00:08:19.507 --> 00:08:22.052
If you don't mind if I share, Please do.

00:08:22.112 --> 00:08:22.892
That's why you're here.

00:08:23.454 --> 00:08:24.300
Oh, okay, thank you.

00:08:24.300 --> 00:08:34.586
So the majority of the victims were female, between 25 and 54, and the majority of the perpetrators were male and of the same 25 to 54.

00:08:34.586 --> 00:08:45.033
The number of victims and perpetrators of ethnic minority remains slightly higher than overrepresented than the general population.

00:08:45.033 --> 00:08:50.206
Four in the five perpetrators were known to the police before the homicide occurred.

00:08:51.128 --> 00:09:08.633
Three in five were for domestic abuse and over a third were known to other agencies, not just the police so quickly when they're saying the perpetrator, are they saying that that's the person who committed the homicide or that's the person who killed themselves?

00:09:08.633 --> 00:09:35.011
Homicide, okay, yeah, that's a huge link, especially in domestic violence and aggressive domestic violence, to be released many times without letting the victim know that they've been released, and they're released prematurely, I think.

00:09:36.533 --> 00:09:55.979
Yes, and another thing is that the majority of the method of suicide was firearm, which we do know the danger of having a firearm, especially in a domestic violence situation, for the risk of death and then also now for the risk of suicide.

00:09:55.999 --> 00:09:56.961
Yeah, so risk of death.

00:09:56.961 --> 00:09:59.210
It increases by 500%.

00:09:59.802 --> 00:10:01.568
It's insane which is insane.

00:10:01.568 --> 00:10:11.254
Some states have laws that if you have a domestic violence charge on you, you're not supposed to own a firearm and that's where it comes in on.

00:10:11.475 --> 00:10:13.301
Is there a domestic violence charge?

00:10:13.301 --> 00:10:21.815
Because my abuser, for instance, owns firearms and I have never filed a report on him?

00:10:22.461 --> 00:10:22.761
mm-hmm.

00:10:22.761 --> 00:10:33.208
There's well to coincide that there's also supposed to be a limitation with mental health diagnoses and owning a firearm.

00:10:33.208 --> 00:10:42.087
And when you fill out I don't know if you remember when you filled out your concealed permit it asks if you've ever been diagnosed with a mental health disorder, and so it's self-report.

00:10:42.087 --> 00:10:45.136
So that is kind of a flaw in the system.

00:10:45.136 --> 00:10:51.499
I'm not saying everyone's mental health record should be free for all to look at, but it's just a flaw.

00:10:51.499 --> 00:10:52.380
I don't have a solution.

00:10:52.461 --> 00:10:55.347
It's just a flaw, I agree, and we aren't getting.

00:10:55.347 --> 00:10:57.399
We're not saying take the guns away.

00:10:57.399 --> 00:10:59.822
We're not saying pro-guns or anything.

00:10:59.822 --> 00:11:05.149
We're just saying that there are these links to what can happen.

00:11:05.149 --> 00:11:13.322
So I'm not familiar with the gun laws in the United Kingdom.

00:11:13.322 --> 00:11:14.244
Is that?

00:11:14.244 --> 00:11:18.734
Did it mention anywhere use of guns with those statistics?

00:11:19.360 --> 00:11:20.660
No, no, it didn't.

00:11:20.660 --> 00:11:29.326
Let's see, 10% of suspects were either currently or previously had been managed by police or on probation.

00:11:29.326 --> 00:11:50.486
Some of the risk factors controlling and coercive behavior, mental health, alcohol use, drug use, mental health, alcohol use, drug use those are some of the things that they found which also are risk factors for suicide.

00:11:50.486 --> 00:12:01.332
So another statistic I found intimate partner violence was a precipitating factor for 4.5% of single suicide events.

00:12:01.332 --> 00:12:05.544
So this doesn't say whether they were the victim or the perpetrator single suicide events.

00:12:05.544 --> 00:12:07.106
So this doesn't say whether they were the victim or the perpetrator.

00:12:07.106 --> 00:12:29.922
And when you combine that with homicide suicide data, it is suggested because, like I said, the data is incomplete because there's not enough research out there that IPV is a precursor for 6.1% of suicides overall, which is it sounds like a small number, but I feel like that is a very, very large number.

00:12:31.283 --> 00:12:32.505
Well, and you are the expert.

00:12:33.288 --> 00:12:42.284
Well, and to compare, chronic pain is 8.8%, job problems of psychosocial employment 6.4%.

00:12:42.284 --> 00:12:53.616
So it is third on the list of of reasons or not reasons precipitating events for suicide.

00:12:53.840 --> 00:13:01.426
So is chronic pain the number one risk factor, I think it's kind of hard to determine.

00:13:02.607 --> 00:13:14.344
Especially you have to go back and look and review, kind of do a behavioral health autopsy on someone's medical history and mental health history to kind of determine what the cause was.

00:13:14.985 --> 00:14:02.985
So if chronic pain is listed in their medical records, you can say that chronic pain was a precipitating factor, I see, yeah, is the longevity of their risk factor for suicide is because, for instance, chronic pain could be something that they could be 10 years out from their abusive relationship but still be suffering from chronic pain that they got as a result of being physically abused by their partner.

00:14:02.985 --> 00:14:04.750
So these, I guess it's real.

00:14:04.750 --> 00:14:16.051
It would be kind of difficult, maybe Again, if it's in somebody who hasn't reported the IPV, to like exactly, exactly, and so yeah the mental health you can.

00:14:16.150 --> 00:14:22.666
If no one, if no one is aware of the IPV happening, they just say mental health is a precipitating factor.

00:14:22.666 --> 00:14:37.985
So it's like I said, the data is it needs to be researched a lot more so we can try to get to the cause and put resources and suicide prevention resources again out there.

00:14:38.466 --> 00:14:47.700
So, in other words, again, statistics are terrible, but they're way worse than what we understand it to be Like.

00:14:47.700 --> 00:14:57.210
For instance, the one in three women, one in three men who are victims of physical violence or sexual violence by their partners.

00:14:57.210 --> 00:15:03.076
Those numbers are actually way worse because the violence is underreported.

00:15:03.076 --> 00:15:09.749
And so then that also coincides with the suicide, because those numbers are underreported, and so then that also coincides with the suicide, because those numbers are underreported.

00:15:11.341 --> 00:15:16.049
And I mean suicide's a top 10 leader of a leading cause of death in the United States.

00:15:16.049 --> 00:15:21.255
They've increased in the last two decades this is from 1999 to 2019.

00:15:21.255 --> 00:15:26.971
And it was a 30% increase over those last.

00:15:26.971 --> 00:15:34.946
The suicide rates have climbed most sharply for women and Black, non-hispanic youth.

00:15:36.328 --> 00:15:38.994
And that data ends at 2019?

00:15:38.994 --> 00:15:38.994
.

00:15:39.740 --> 00:15:39.941
Yes.

00:15:40.501 --> 00:15:46.774
Okay, so it was probably way worse, considering that COVID was just around the corner from that.

00:16:15.519 --> 00:16:17.743
They put.

00:16:17.763 --> 00:16:39.668
It's one of the resources that I'm going to share for you to put in your show notes and they actually came out with a whole entire report and options for people because of COVID, and they were aware that domestic violence and suicide rates were your partner is able to go to work every day, or both of you is able to go to work and escape from being in the same physical environment 24 hours, seven days a week, and then COVID shuts that down.

00:16:39.668 --> 00:16:50.851
So already before you're getting some sort of reprieve, and suicide might be something that you have been considering, and now you're getting some sort of reprieve and suicide might be something that you have been considering, and now you're just inundated in this abuse.

00:16:50.851 --> 00:16:58.316
There, I, I could complete, and, and nowhere to go, and then you can't even get if you were getting therapy.

00:16:58.316 --> 00:17:02.546
How are you supposed to get therapy with your abuser in the house, exactly?

00:17:02.546 --> 00:17:07.934
So, yeah, I imagine those numbers are insanely elevated.

00:17:09.721 --> 00:17:26.608
So, in regards to the adult section of suicide, survivors of IPV are twice as likely to attempt suicide multiple times than the general population.

00:17:29.080 --> 00:17:33.451
And that's survivors like people who are out of the relationship.

00:17:33.892 --> 00:17:45.061
No, you know, I didn't read the specifications, you know and that's fine, because I think the definition of victim and survivor varies from individual.

00:17:45.061 --> 00:18:10.715
So, like I personally feel a victim is in the relationship and may consider the understanding of what's happening but is still excusing it, like for myself, I was a victim for quite a while and then I feel that you become a survivor not when you physically get out, but when you realize this is happening to me.

00:18:10.715 --> 00:18:19.082
I need to get out, because now you're in survivor mode, I'm going to do this.

00:18:19.082 --> 00:18:26.994
So I mean it varies, because some other individuals will consider a survivor as somebody who is physically removed from the abuse.

00:18:28.641 --> 00:18:32.632
So back to, like, the attempting suicide portion.

00:18:32.632 --> 00:18:56.792
I don't know if you have anything to talk about with this, but there may be attempts as and I'm not sure if this is the correct terminology to use I know that with suicide things have changed a little bit as far as what you are supposed to say and what you're not supposed to say, but attempting suicide could be an actual cry for help, not completing suicide.

00:18:56.792 --> 00:19:02.463
And it may not just be I'm really sad and depressed, really sad and depressed.

00:19:02.463 --> 00:19:13.138
It may be like, hey, somebody pay attention to me, I'm being abused and I have no idea how else to say something about it or bring attention to this.

00:19:15.632 --> 00:19:19.381
It could be Suicide attempts again, it's.

00:19:19.381 --> 00:19:34.297
Unfortunately the definitions of attempts are also subjective, based on the level of training and experience of the person reporting it the medical or mental health professional.

00:19:34.297 --> 00:19:42.358
A lot times self-harm and suicide have been interjected like for each other and it's not correct.

00:19:42.358 --> 00:19:54.679
Self-harm is like cutting where you just like, try to physically harm yourself, not in a way to actually end your own life, and suicide attempts can also vary from.

00:19:55.279 --> 00:19:56.742
There's a thing called preparatory behavior.

00:19:56.742 --> 00:20:08.421
Preparatory behavior is where you say, like you stockpile all of your medications with the thoughts of I'm going to overdose on them later, but you're not physically doing that right now.

00:20:08.421 --> 00:20:14.042
That's preparatory behavior which is also very, very concerning because people are at risk for most.

00:20:14.042 --> 00:20:20.098
It's generally 90 days after someone does that or like goes to a store and buys a gun as preparatory behavior.

00:20:20.098 --> 00:20:23.055
They're most at risk for 90 days following that preparatory behavior.

00:20:23.055 --> 00:20:29.755
A suicide attempt could also be putting a gun into your mouth but not pulling the trigger.

00:20:29.755 --> 00:20:34.054
Or it could also be putting a gun into your mouth pulling the trigger knowing a bullet's not in there.

00:20:34.054 --> 00:20:35.818
Or putting a gun into your mouth pulling the trigger knowing a bullet's not in there.

00:20:35.818 --> 00:20:39.670
Or putting a gun in your mouth, pulling the trigger, knowing a bullet's in there and the gun doesn't fire.

00:20:39.670 --> 00:20:45.403
So those are all my definitions of suicide attempts.

00:20:45.403 --> 00:20:53.303
But again it's subjective on the mental health and medical professional as to what they say it is.

00:20:54.931 --> 00:21:44.173
That makes sense, which makes this whole suicide and domestic violence suck, obviously, but it makes it so much more difficult to identify all the specifics in order to be able to treat all the specifics, because there is such a differentiation in subjective suicide, even thoughts of wishing that they were dead not necessarily suicidal thoughts, but just thoughts of I wish I was dead.

00:21:44.233 --> 00:21:46.121
There are some ways to some mitigating factors that you could do.

00:21:46.121 --> 00:21:47.404
One of the big things is lethal means safety.

00:21:47.404 --> 00:21:53.116
It is trying to put some kind of barrier between that person and whatever method they want to follow through with on suicide.

00:21:53.116 --> 00:22:12.609
So gun locks, giving someone, a family member, access, giving them your firearm for the meantime I know in domestic violence situations that may not always be possible, especially if you're isolated you could always put the bullets in a different spot and put the firearm in a different spot.

00:22:12.609 --> 00:22:28.036
So it takes several steps for that person to actually go get the bullets, put them in the gun and during that duration of time, hopefully some kind of intervention can be put in place, whether it be them calling someone, calling a friend or them just changing their thought process as well.

00:22:28.036 --> 00:22:30.682
And same thing with medications.

00:22:30.682 --> 00:22:34.654
There's a lot of ways that you can dispose of extra medications around the house.

00:22:34.654 --> 00:22:43.865
If you're having thoughts of suicide and you want to overdose, you can ask your provider can I only get a week supply at a time instead of a 30 or 90 day supply?

00:22:43.865 --> 00:22:49.759
And another part of the mitigating.

00:22:49.759 --> 00:22:52.723
Things to do is to involve family and friends.

00:22:52.723 --> 00:22:55.117
That's not always possible in this situation.

00:22:55.117 --> 00:22:56.963
Things to do is to involve family and friends.

00:22:56.963 --> 00:23:04.611
That's not always possible in this situation, so it is.

00:23:04.631 --> 00:23:04.811
There's a.

00:23:04.811 --> 00:23:05.273
There's a phone number.

00:23:05.273 --> 00:23:06.519
There's a crisis line phone number that is the best to use.

00:23:06.519 --> 00:23:07.383
I know there's a domestic violence hotline.

00:23:07.383 --> 00:23:10.113
There's also the 988 crisis line which you can call.

00:23:10.113 --> 00:23:11.175
You can be anonymous.

00:23:11.175 --> 00:23:12.941
You don't have to provide your name.

00:23:12.941 --> 00:23:22.123
The only reason that they will get access to your information is if they think that you're at imminent risk of hurting yourself.

00:23:22.789 --> 00:23:40.766
Well, I suppose one of the concerns with a domestic violence victim in getting other people involved is I mean, there's always so many issues with that Because, again, you may not be acknowledging that what you're having is abuse.

00:23:40.766 --> 00:23:58.932
So I've said before, for instance, I didn't want to let you know everything that was going on because I didn't want you to judge my partner, Because how could we go to you know, how could we hang out together with you knowing everything about him.

00:23:58.932 --> 00:24:07.711
So that might be something that holds a victim back from getting family or friends involved.

00:24:07.711 --> 00:24:18.827
There's also the concern of you don't want someone to intervene so you may confide in a colleague.

00:24:18.827 --> 00:24:35.314
Well, what happens if that colleague is very ambitious and decides to contact law enforcement for a well check or something along those lines and the abuser's home, and so law enforcement comes for a well check on you, not for a domestic violence disturbance.

00:24:35.314 --> 00:24:42.464
But now that has keyed your abuser into the idea of who are you talking to and what are you saying.

00:24:44.092 --> 00:24:51.538
Which puts you at risk, and another, not even the physical abuse, like the emotional abuse of intimate partner violence.

00:24:51.538 --> 00:25:02.673
This person will get beat down and think that everything that they're saying is true and may not want to reach out because they've been beat down so much and I think no one else cares.

00:25:03.173 --> 00:25:06.843
This is what Absolutely that you're lucky to have me.

00:25:06.843 --> 00:25:11.236
You're nothing without me, nobody else is going to care about you.

00:25:11.236 --> 00:25:16.865
That's all part of the isolation tactics, too, right Is you know?

00:25:16.865 --> 00:25:18.093
I'm going to make your.

00:25:18.093 --> 00:25:20.159
Your sister doesn't care about you.

00:25:20.159 --> 00:25:23.618
If she really cared about you, she'd be here and you start to believe it.

00:25:23.618 --> 00:25:25.244
And so how am I?

00:25:25.244 --> 00:25:26.912
I'm not going to talk to my sister about it.

00:25:26.912 --> 00:25:32.832
I believe now my sister doesn't care about me and so yeah, which is never, ever going to be true.

00:25:33.353 --> 00:25:35.695
Well, I know that I'm giving it as an example.

00:25:35.695 --> 00:25:39.320
I probably did believe it for a little bit, though it crossed my mind every once in a while.

00:25:39.320 --> 00:25:44.969
Oh my goodness, I do still believe that You're mom and dad's favorite, but we won't get into that right now.

00:25:44.969 --> 00:25:45.509
Well, that's a given.

00:25:45.930 --> 00:25:47.230
That is 100% a given.

00:25:49.032 --> 00:25:49.353
Okay.

00:25:49.353 --> 00:26:00.363
So I'm going to interject here that if Jessica and I laugh a little bit, we actually one, we're sisters and we have a good relationship.

00:26:00.363 --> 00:26:02.404
But two, we actually have a podcast.

00:26:02.404 --> 00:26:05.106
That's a separate podcast where we do goof around.

00:26:05.106 --> 00:26:11.096
So even on serious topics we will try to laugh here and there.

00:26:11.096 --> 00:26:14.230
So we're not minimizing this topic.

00:26:14.230 --> 00:26:15.172
It's a super serious.

00:26:15.172 --> 00:26:20.058
Both suicide and domestic violence are super, super serious relationships.

00:26:20.138 --> 00:26:25.134
But uh and both, both of our passions, my passion and your passion, absolutely it's it's.

00:26:25.335 --> 00:26:32.334
The passions are colliding and every once in a while we'll make light of something ridiculous mechanism.

00:26:32.515 --> 00:26:32.994
Please forgive us.

00:26:32.994 --> 00:26:33.154
Yes.

00:26:33.556 --> 00:26:35.478
And we're probably making light of ourselves.

00:26:35.478 --> 00:26:37.299
So not the actual topic.

00:26:37.299 --> 00:26:40.503
Okay, so back to you.

00:26:40.503 --> 00:26:42.105
I think this is about to get sucky.

00:26:42.631 --> 00:26:45.035
This is so.

00:26:45.035 --> 00:26:54.376
I wanted also to look into the data on how children are impacted with suicide and domestic violence, intimate partner violence.

00:26:54.376 --> 00:26:58.434
I did not find any research in the United States.

00:26:58.434 --> 00:27:05.721
I didn't do a lot of deep digging on it because it's just a really crappy topic and I don't.

00:27:05.721 --> 00:27:06.522
Yeah, sorry.

00:27:07.329 --> 00:27:17.777
So again, your background is primarily adults yes, so I found an Australian report from.

00:27:17.777 --> 00:27:20.798
It was published in 2022.

00:27:20.798 --> 00:27:24.740
So I wanted something recent because actually there's not a lot out there.

00:27:24.740 --> 00:27:35.407
And psycho, psychosocial risk factors were the most common factors associated with suicide in Australia.

00:27:35.407 --> 00:27:40.201
So the you know things going on in interpersonally.

00:27:41.790 --> 00:27:46.181
And did it give an age range, or that's just blanket, that's just blanket, okay.

00:27:46.662 --> 00:27:46.863
Okay.

00:27:46.863 --> 00:27:52.458
So then also international studies, which were.

00:27:52.458 --> 00:28:00.195
When I looked, there was a lot of Asian studies, like there was Bangladesh was in there, there was some Indian studies in there.

00:28:00.195 --> 00:28:02.898
It was fascinating, but I couldn't find any from the US.

00:28:02.898 --> 00:28:17.298
So the international studies have specifically identified child maltreatment and experiences of domestic family violence as significant contributing factors to avoidable deaths in early adulthood.

00:28:19.471 --> 00:28:27.038
This is just so the abuse that they witnessed or experienced as a child is carrying over into their suicide risk as adults.

00:28:27.981 --> 00:28:29.877
No, these are still children completing suicide.

00:28:29.877 --> 00:28:41.184
So Australia has decided to pay closer attention as to the leading causes and risk factors of children completing suicide, because their rates have been higher.

00:28:41.184 --> 00:28:54.566
There's a recent national study of a little over 5,000 young Australians and it revealed that one in two of young people in Australia grow up with some form of domestic family violence.

00:28:54.566 --> 00:28:56.998
One in two.

00:28:56.998 --> 00:28:58.368
One in two, one in two.

00:28:58.368 --> 00:29:09.486
So their definition of domestic family violence does include IPV and child mistreatment, child abuse.

00:29:10.451 --> 00:29:12.758
Okay, but still one in two.

00:29:12.758 --> 00:29:15.435
One in two oh my God, that's awful.

00:29:17.332 --> 00:29:40.375
So this part discusses the witnessing and it says that, although they may not be the intended target, this form of they called it vicarious victimization they called it vicarious victimization it can lead to similar outcomes as the person actually experiencing the abuse.

00:29:40.375 --> 00:30:08.336
The primary target and object of the abuse during childhood have been identified as a risk factor for suicide attempts and also suicidal ideation, which is the thoughts of suicide and the planning, which kind of goes back to the preparatory behaviors I was talking.

00:30:08.336 --> 00:30:12.369
So here's a crappy statistic and this is the last of the data I have on this because, like I said, I just breaks my heart.

00:30:12.369 --> 00:30:30.567
A recent study, which was published in 2021, showed a significant association between experiences of domestic family violence and suicidal behaviors among individuals aged 10 to 20 years old.

00:30:30.567 --> 00:30:36.890
So it is a significant association.

00:30:36.890 --> 00:30:46.416
So children who experience or witness are are more likely to have suicidal behaviors between 10 and 20.

00:30:47.707 --> 00:30:49.433
And I understand that's not in the United States.

00:30:49.433 --> 00:30:56.756
I actually do have statistics, for in the United States it's not suicide, it's not suicide related, but just domestic violence related.

00:30:56.756 --> 00:31:03.439
One out of 15 children are exposed to intimate partner violence annually in the United States.

00:31:03.439 --> 00:31:16.170
90% are eyewitnesses in the United States, 90% are eyewitnesses.

00:31:16.170 --> 00:31:18.374
So you take that statistic and align it with the statistics that you have it's humongous.

00:31:18.374 --> 00:31:22.465
I'm not going to do the math, but it's horrible, horrible statistics.

00:31:22.465 --> 00:31:39.844
This isn't intimate partner violence, but just to report these findings as well is one out of five female high school students and over 13% male high school students report physical or sexual abuse by their dating partner.

00:31:40.364 --> 00:31:40.904
Oh, my goodness.

00:31:41.065 --> 00:31:47.459
So I'm sure that those factors also play into consideration of risk for suicide.

00:31:47.459 --> 00:31:56.596
Well, they definitely do, especially based on what you told us at the beginning of this episode as far as risk factors for suicide.

00:31:56.596 --> 00:32:07.133
But these individuals, these high school students, if you're not going to consider that, I mean it is domestic violence, it's intimate partner violence.

00:32:07.133 --> 00:32:21.544
It may not be domestic in terms of residing in the same household at that point, but these people are now at higher risk to end up in an actual cohabitation of domestic violence.

00:32:22.125 --> 00:32:24.412
Exactly Whether it's an intimate partner or a roommate even.

00:32:24.913 --> 00:32:25.375
Exactly.

00:32:25.375 --> 00:32:31.438
And another thing that goes along with the children is that the children see these relationships growing up and it becomes normalized for them.

00:32:31.438 --> 00:32:41.319
So when they do become adults, they tend to I'm not going to say they tend to, but they can veer towards those kind of relationships because that's what's normal for them.

00:32:41.319 --> 00:32:47.898
And it brings up the same risk factors the mental health, the hopelessness, the isolation all of those same risk factors for suicide.

00:32:49.105 --> 00:32:51.352
Well, in addition to that, they're at higher risk.

00:32:51.352 --> 00:33:01.645
Children witnessing not even experiencing the abuse themselves, but witnessing there are higher rates for substance abuse and alcohol abuse.

00:33:01.645 --> 00:33:13.698
As they I mean even probably as a teenage years and as they progress through life, they're at a higher risk for substance abuse, which then, in turn, increases the risk for suicide.

00:33:15.486 --> 00:33:28.898
One of the things that I've noticed in my professional experience with suicide is every I would say almost every single person that I've come across, hopelessness is always mentioned.

00:33:28.898 --> 00:33:38.877
They have no hope, they see no way out, and imagine a child witnessing domestic violence against one of their parents, like a parent on parent.

00:33:38.877 --> 00:33:40.951
Can you imagine how hopeless?

00:33:40.971 --> 00:33:50.538
they feel Well and so confused and I've said this before that as a child, your biggest role models are mom and dad.

00:33:50.538 --> 00:33:53.189
Yeah, so let's not even you know.

00:33:53.189 --> 00:33:55.936
I'm just going to say good guy, bad guy, just to simplify things.

00:33:55.936 --> 00:34:05.539
So even if one of the parents is the bad guy and you know that person is abusing the other parent, who's the good guy?

00:34:05.539 --> 00:34:12.793
The child is going to be so confused anyway because these are his or her role models, they're heroes.

00:34:12.793 --> 00:34:20.809
And now you have bad guy abusing good guy or even talking badly about the good guy.

00:34:20.809 --> 00:34:28.760
So now they start to doubt the good guy and they doubt their reality, and you're right.

00:34:28.760 --> 00:34:41.228
Then they say, okay, well, this is how dad treats mom, or mom treats dad, and that's okay and also bring into the fact of second marriages or second partners.

00:34:41.809 --> 00:34:52.255
And when the parent that you thought was your quote-unquote good parent brings in an abusive partner, and what message is that giving to the child?

00:34:53.065 --> 00:34:55.755
Absolutely, especially in domestic violence.

00:34:55.755 --> 00:35:05.637
Unfortunately, being a survivor of domestic violence, you are at a higher risk of becoming involved in another domestic violent relationship.

00:35:05.637 --> 00:35:08.847
Okay, do you have more statistics?

00:35:09.489 --> 00:35:10.030
I don't.

00:35:10.030 --> 00:35:12.652
Okay, I don't have any more statistics.

00:35:13.293 --> 00:35:15.376
I think I might be okay with that.

00:35:15.456 --> 00:35:17.039
I'm actually okay with that too.

00:35:17.039 --> 00:35:18.965
Yes, Okay.

00:35:19.166 --> 00:35:28.873
So just to wrap up and sort of consolidate, could you just sort of streamline your information?

00:35:28.873 --> 00:35:40.318
So I suppose, risks one more time for suicide and then warning signs, I think would be a good one for people to be aware of.

00:35:41.184 --> 00:35:41.465
Okay.

00:35:41.585 --> 00:35:58.188
So some of the risk factors the mental health, substance use, impulsivity, hopelessness, isolation, access to the lethal means, whether it be a firearm, medications, a rope, a car access restricting access to lethal means.

00:35:58.789 --> 00:36:06.391
The psychosocial stressors and the legal stressors and, most importantly, especially in IPV, the relationship stressors.

00:36:06.391 --> 00:36:07.574
Those are some of the risk factors.

00:36:07.574 --> 00:36:38.311
Some of the signs and symptoms would be the preparatory behavior, the stockpiling of the medication, seeking access to lethal means, whether it be researching where to purchase a firearm, researching methods, whatever it could be, giving away items, lack of interest in things that they used to enjoy, the isolation.

00:36:38.311 --> 00:36:43.000
But when it comes to IPV, some of that isolation may not be in their option to control.

00:36:43.000 --> 00:36:51.751
Those are some of the risk factors that you can pay attention to, the risk just because are not risk factors.

00:36:51.751 --> 00:36:52.974
Some of those are.

00:36:52.974 --> 00:37:05.849
Those may be some of the signs, but also know that there may be zero signs of it and someone preparing a will that could be a sign and it could just be someone being super.

00:37:05.849 --> 00:37:07.896
You know, responsible.

00:37:07.896 --> 00:37:11.007
Oh, I thought you were going to say something.

00:37:11.007 --> 00:37:13.576
I was going to say responsible for you.

00:37:13.576 --> 00:37:14.726
Oh, okay, thank you.

00:37:15.347 --> 00:37:23.315
Another thing that I would say is if you are a friend or family member and you notice some of these signs, or you notice something, or you just have this feeling.

00:37:23.315 --> 00:37:26.737
Ask, ask that person are you having thoughts of suicide?

00:37:26.737 --> 00:37:29.128
Do not ask, are you thinking about harming yourself?

00:37:29.128 --> 00:37:36.197
Because again, that could be the self-harm, that could be the cutting which is a maladaptive coping skill to help deal with things.

00:37:36.197 --> 00:37:40.148
So you need to ask specifically are you having thoughts of suicide?

00:37:40.148 --> 00:37:51.358
And just because you ask someone, that it's not going to put the idea in their head, if they have the idea, it is already there and if they say yes, it does not mean that they're going to do it in front of you.

00:37:51.358 --> 00:37:52.960
So you don't need to be scared of the answer.

00:37:52.960 --> 00:37:56.786
If someone does say, yes, I'm having thoughts of suicide, don't leave them alone.

00:37:56.786 --> 00:38:07.619
Just sit there, ask what's going on or just be silent and let them talk, validate, validate, validate, validate, validate their feelings, validate that.

00:38:07.619 --> 00:38:11.967
Yes, that sounds very difficult.

00:38:11.967 --> 00:38:15.471
I see that you're thinking about suicide and that can be really scary.

00:38:15.471 --> 00:38:23.298
That can be terrifying to have those thoughts and then try to encourage, to get them help, and some of the ways they can get help in.

00:38:23.358 --> 00:38:25.822
One of the immediate ways is an emergency room.

00:38:25.822 --> 00:38:27.530
If you're ever having thoughts of suicide.

00:38:27.530 --> 00:38:29.155
You can always go to an emergency room.

00:38:29.155 --> 00:38:30.851
You'll get evaluated there.

00:38:30.851 --> 00:38:32.952
They won't always keep you.

00:38:32.952 --> 00:38:36.635
The only time they will is if they think you are at an imminent risk of hurting yourself.

00:38:36.635 --> 00:38:41.717
Which means if you leave that hospital you are going to go out and try to complete suicide.

00:38:41.717 --> 00:38:43.271
So that's the only way you stay.

00:38:43.271 --> 00:38:49.873
You can always voluntarily go inpatient if you want to, and if you voluntarily go you get a voluntarily leave.

00:38:49.873 --> 00:38:52.175
So an emergency room is an option.

00:38:52.675 --> 00:38:54.577
Calling 911 is also an option.

00:38:54.577 --> 00:38:56.661
And then I mentioned it earlier the crisis line.

00:38:56.661 --> 00:39:06.809
It is 988, just like 911 is 988.

00:39:06.809 --> 00:39:07.371
You can remain anonymous.

00:39:07.371 --> 00:39:12.445
If you're a veteran, you can dial 988 and then you press one and that way you get taken to the military and veterans crisis line instead of the general crisis line.

00:39:12.445 --> 00:39:14.284
But they can provide you resources.

00:39:14.284 --> 00:39:18.773
They can just be a person to listen to and again, you can remain anonymous.

00:39:18.773 --> 00:39:24.530
The only way that they would try to find you is if you are again at risk of imminently hurting yourself.

00:39:24.530 --> 00:39:37.652
And then SAMHSA, which is the Substance Abuse and Mental Health Services Administration Sorry, I had a blink.

00:39:37.652 --> 00:39:44.849
They created a zero suicide toolkit for providers, community members, individuals.

00:39:44.849 --> 00:39:48.677
I'll send Ingrid the link so she can put it in her show notes.

00:39:48.677 --> 00:40:03.726
That's a pretty helpful toolkit and can also give you ideas or options of things that you can do for your family member, friend, community whatever you feel like doing, so you can just have that toolkit, absolutely okay.

00:40:04.146 --> 00:40:14.032
What are and I I know that healthcare providers and law enforcement individuals are trained on this, but what do they?

00:40:14.032 --> 00:40:19.615
For instance, what did they do if they find somebody who appears to be in immediate crisis?

00:40:19.615 --> 00:40:23.077
So that you know, people can understand.

00:40:23.077 --> 00:40:27.860
I know you mentioned the ER and they're not going to hold you unless they feel that you're an imminent threat.

00:40:27.860 --> 00:40:40.115
But if somebody were considering suicide and seriously considering it at that moment and they decide to call law enforcement, what can they expect to?

00:40:40.577 --> 00:40:40.898
happen.

00:40:40.898 --> 00:40:44.648
It actually depends on where you are.

00:40:44.648 --> 00:40:52.128
So I have, if you, I've called welfare checks on people before when they had the like how you said.

00:40:52.128 --> 00:41:05.934
They had the suicidal ideation, they had the intention, which means when you say intention, it means they want to follow through with it and they know that the consequences of their actions, they know that if they take all these pills that they will die.

00:41:05.934 --> 00:41:11.456
So if they have that intent and know the definition of that intent, so suicidal ideation, intent means.

00:41:11.836 --> 00:41:31.119
So when I have called welfare checks, if it is a busier metroplex, the police will get there when they can and it is very terrifying staying on the phone with someone who has suicidal ideation, intent and means waiting for the police to show up, and it can take 45 minutes.

00:41:31.119 --> 00:41:49.606
However, if it's more local and they have a designated task force, a mental health task force, a crisis team some places do they can send them out and evaluate them them.

00:41:49.606 --> 00:41:54.306
The police will show up, they'll talk to the individual and, although they are not mental health professionals, they will assess and they will base their assessment on what the person says.

00:41:54.306 --> 00:42:03.914
So say you call 911 on someone who has suicidal ideation, intent and means and when the police show up, they're like no, I don't, I don't, I'm not planning on killing myself.

00:42:03.914 --> 00:42:08.456
I was just saying that the police will not push it any further.

00:42:08.456 --> 00:42:19.840
However, if they continue talking to the individual and they feel that person is at risk and needs a further evaluation, you will get taken to your closest emergency room in a police car.

00:42:19.840 --> 00:42:26.478
Sometimes you are handcuffed for your safety, sometimes you are not.

00:42:26.478 --> 00:42:33.925
It depends on the police department, honestly, and it varies, but you get taken to the closest emergency room.

00:42:34.005 --> 00:43:00.938
So, even if you have an emergency room that you prefer, or a hospital you prefer or another one, the police and the EMS will always take you to the closest one emergency department and the professionals determine that they are indeed a risk, an imminent risk to themselves, they admit and they decide that they cannot discharge them from their facility If they have the capacity to hold that individual like first of all.

00:43:00.938 --> 00:43:08.574
If they don't have the capacity, is there a chance that they get transferred to somewhere else or the facilities or the resources to properly treat them?

00:43:09.844 --> 00:43:11.090
What do you mean if they don't have the capacity?

00:43:11.844 --> 00:43:16.719
So, for instance, say it's just like a small hospital.

00:43:16.719 --> 00:43:28.956
They don't have the room, nor they don't have somebody that could you know, they don't have like a psych unit for this person or they don't have enough staff to keep eyes on this person.

00:43:28.956 --> 00:43:34.577
I suppose there would be a potential for them to get transferred to another facility.

00:43:35.005 --> 00:43:46.527
Absolutely, and most emergency rooms do have mental health rooms, whether it be one or two, and you would remain on a one-to-one, which means a nurse or some staff at the hospital would sit with you the whole time.

00:43:46.527 --> 00:43:52.333
If you get brought in by the police department or EMS, they will just so you know.

00:43:52.333 --> 00:43:55.887
They will take your belongings to include your cell phone.

00:43:55.887 --> 00:44:00.550
You can't get your cell phone back to get a phone number if you need to call a family member or friend.

00:44:00.550 --> 00:44:06.389
However, your belongings get taken from you and they make sure that you're in a mental health room.

00:44:06.389 --> 00:44:10.559
So there's no risks of you completing suicide while you're in the actual room.

00:44:11.501 --> 00:44:21.552
If a person, if the medical professionals think that you need to be hospitalized and you do not want to be hospitalized, they will get a legal warrant.

00:44:21.552 --> 00:44:23.918
A detention warrant is what we call it here in Texas.

00:44:23.918 --> 00:44:26.552
You can get a detention or involuntary hold.

00:44:26.552 --> 00:44:34.932
They get put in front of a judge and it's a mandatory 72 hour hold.

00:44:34.932 --> 00:44:36.358
You cannot be discharged until the end of that 72 hours.

00:44:36.358 --> 00:44:41.472
That's why I said if you go into a hospital voluntarily, you can still voluntarily leave if you do get hospitalized.

00:44:41.472 --> 00:44:44.666
So that's, there's something to expect.

00:44:44.706 --> 00:44:48.416
But if you go into an emergency room on your own, say, a friend or you bring yourself in.

00:44:48.416 --> 00:44:51.791
Most times you can still have.

00:44:51.791 --> 00:44:56.355
They'll put you on a one to one, but most times you can still have access to your phone to be able to call.

00:44:56.355 --> 00:45:01.690
Or if you go in with a friend, I have known some emergency rooms to let the friend or family member stay in the room with you.

00:45:02.844 --> 00:45:10.695
One thing I'm so sorry I meant to bring this up earlier is that there has been research that says that someone is suicidal.

00:45:10.695 --> 00:45:14.541
From thoughts to actual action occurs in less than an hour.

00:45:14.541 --> 00:45:24.478
So that's why the lethal means is so important to put time in between, so it can last from five minutes to an hour from thought to action.

00:45:24.478 --> 00:45:44.572
So if you know or you yourself are experiencing that even that initial thought, if you have a safety plan much like a domestic violence safety plan of where you have someone you can call to distract them some kind of music, movie, go for a walk, some kind of activity to get yourself out of that.

00:45:44.572 --> 00:45:48.608
A safety, a suicidal, some kind of activity to get yourself out of that.

00:45:48.628 --> 00:45:54.746
A safety, a suicidal, suicide safety plan is another good tool to have, and that can be another example of where code words come into play.

00:45:55.286 --> 00:46:04.347
You know, if your abuser's in the home and you have a trusted confidant of where you feel like I have, I have no other option right now.

00:46:04.347 --> 00:46:08.813
You can call them and give your code word so that person knows.

00:46:08.813 --> 00:46:13.679
Okay, this is the one-hour time frame I have right now.

00:46:13.679 --> 00:46:15.101
I have a question for you.

00:46:15.101 --> 00:46:26.318
So you said it could take up to 45 minutes and you know, possibly if it's just really crappy places, it could maybe even take more than 45 minutes.

00:46:26.318 --> 00:46:39.420
If you are someone who has been confided in this, say you call me and you say I want to complete suicide.

00:46:39.420 --> 00:46:43.407
I have the firearm is sitting in my lap right now.

00:46:43.407 --> 00:46:49.608
I understand that this is it and I'm not going to come back from that and this is what I plan to do.

00:46:49.608 --> 00:46:55.068
What do you suggest that person on the other phone do, like you don't want them to hang up right.

00:46:55.469 --> 00:46:57.215
No, no, stay on the phone with them?

00:46:57.824 --> 00:47:01.295
How do you contact, how do you get law enforcement and stay on the phone with them?

00:47:01.295 --> 00:47:07.393
How do you do all of that If in a professional setting.

00:47:07.432 --> 00:47:13.201
When I've had to do that, I have messaged coworkers of please call 911 and do a welfare check on this.

00:47:13.201 --> 00:47:23.099
So if I was on my personal phone I'd probably put that person on speaker and text someone and say you need to call 911 and have them come to this address.

00:47:23.099 --> 00:47:24.807
And that's another thing.

00:47:24.807 --> 00:47:26.735
You have to know what that person is, yeah.

00:47:34.284 --> 00:47:35.786
So, and then you just stay on the line until somebody gets there?

00:47:35.786 --> 00:47:36.648
Yes, because the second you hang up.

00:47:36.668 --> 00:47:37.268
That could be alone.

00:47:37.268 --> 00:47:37.789
They're alone.

00:47:37.789 --> 00:47:41.152
You never want to leave someone who's suicidal alone.

00:47:43.996 --> 00:47:48.320
Okay, well, thank you, jessica.

00:47:48.320 --> 00:47:49.362
You're welcome.

00:47:49.362 --> 00:47:51.188
I'm sorry.

00:47:51.228 --> 00:47:52.994
I talked longer than I thought I meant to.

00:47:52.994 --> 00:47:54.989
This is what we do.

00:47:58.606 --> 00:48:02.090
This is what happens when our passions collide.

00:48:02.090 --> 00:48:10.400
Okay, so in summary again, jessica just went over the not risk.

00:48:10.400 --> 00:48:20.815
Well, you did go over the risk factors earlier in this episode, but you did just summarize what are some clues that somebody may be considering suicide, and then you summarized what somebody should do.

00:48:20.815 --> 00:48:25.550
We talked about what could happen once help is activated.

00:48:25.550 --> 00:48:30.480
Is there anything else you can think of that we need to bring up?

00:48:36.447 --> 00:48:37.391
Nothing I can think of.

00:48:37.985 --> 00:48:45.329
So again, I thank you very, very much for taking the time out of your incredibly busy life to come on and talk.

00:48:45.329 --> 00:48:50.059
I I'm not being serious, are you?

00:48:50.059 --> 00:48:52.027
I am you guys.

00:48:52.027 --> 00:48:53.911
Jessica works full time.

00:48:53.911 --> 00:48:56.795
Her husband works full time.

00:48:56.795 --> 00:48:58.438
She has two kids.

00:48:58.438 --> 00:49:03.295
We used to have, like I said, we used to have a podcast so that we kept updated.

00:49:03.295 --> 00:49:06.949
It's been on hold for a bit, but we're going to come back.

00:49:06.949 --> 00:49:11.114
But I do really appreciate you coming on here.

00:49:11.114 --> 00:49:15.358
I know this is your passion, but it still is a sucky topic, as is mine.

00:49:15.358 --> 00:49:18.041
So I really do appreciate it.

00:49:18.041 --> 00:49:26.425
I hope and again, I will list those resources that Jessica mentioned in the show notes, as well as the crisis line, which is 988.

00:49:26.425 --> 00:49:28.480
Super notes, as well as the crisis line, which is 988.

00:49:28.480 --> 00:49:30.481
Super easy 988 for the crisis line.

00:49:30.481 --> 00:49:30.925
Can I say?

00:49:30.965 --> 00:49:32.088
thank you for having me on here.

00:49:32.088 --> 00:49:39.936
Suicide prevention is a huge passion of mine and talking about it is one of the best ways to get the information out.

00:49:39.936 --> 00:49:47.538
Talking about suicide making that person feel comfortable and normal to be able to talk to you about it is huge.

00:49:47.538 --> 00:49:54.117
I can't tell you how huge it is Just having someone that they can confide in and get all their stuff out.

00:49:54.117 --> 00:49:55.650
So talk about it.

00:49:56.164 --> 00:49:58.213
Once again, jessica, thank you so much.

00:49:58.213 --> 00:50:09.177
The links to everything that she mentioned, as well as the crisis line, will be listed in the show notes and I will be back next week with another episode for you.

00:50:09.177 --> 00:50:16.534
And until then, stay strong and, wherever you are in your journey, always remember you are not alone.

00:50:16.534 --> 00:50:23.871
Find more information, register as a guest or leave a review by going to the website onein3podcastcom.

00:50:23.871 --> 00:50:25.349
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00:50:25.349 --> 00:50:28.500
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00:50:28.500 --> 00:50:34.882
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00:50:34.882 --> 00:50:37.769
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00:50:37.769 --> 00:50:43.768
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