Dec. 13, 2023

26-Domestic Violence PERPETRATOR: Michelle Knotek Part 5; the children

26-Domestic Violence PERPETRATOR: Michelle Knotek Part 5; the children

Uncover the harrowing tale of a home terrorized by the very person supposed to provide love and care - the mother. This latest episode sheds light on the horrors endured by Shelly's three daughters and nephew, victims of her relentless physical, verbal, and psychological abuse. Join me on this gut-wrenching journey as I unravel the siblings' heartbreaking longing for a nurturing mother figure amidst their torment, and their strength in surviving such an ordeal.

Sources:
“If You Tell: A True Story of Murder, Family Secrets, and the Unbreakable Bond of Sisterhood” by Gregg Olsen


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Cover art by Laura Swift Dahlke
Music by Tim Crowe

Transcript
Speaker 1:

Hi Warriors, welcome to 1 in 3, I'm your host, ingrid. I'm going to power through and get this story finished because I have let it drag on long enough. Today I'm going to cover the horrifying abuse Shelly inflicted on her three daughters and nephew Guys. This is the episode I have been dreading and quite possibly the reason it has taken me so long to finish this piece on Shelly. Please proceed with discretion. This is the conclusion of the multi-episode story on domestic violence perpetrator Michelle No-Tech. In episode 24, I mentioned Shelly and her third husband, dave had baby Tori in 1989. Rounding out the children in the house at the time would be 14-year-old Nikki, 10-year-old Sammy and 13-year-old Shane Watson. As a reminder, nikki, sammy and Tori are all Shelly's biological daughters, fathered by her three separate husbands. Now, shane was the son of Shelly's youngest brother, paul. Paul had run away from home at the age of 15 years and lived a life full of drugs, crime and biker gangs. He returned in three years with a pregnant girlfriend of native Alaskan descent who unfortunately had a substance abuse problem of her own. Shane was born in June 1975. He was brought to the No-Tech home in 1988. Following a very difficult young childhood. Shane instantly gained popularity at school. Given his dark features reflecting his mother's heritage, his tough yet funny and friendly demeanor made him quite lovable. Shelly went to work preparing a proper welcome for Shane. She bought him new clothes and created a bedroom in the basement for him. Shane felt so at home. He immediately began referring to Shelly and Dave as mom and dad. However, once Shane settled in, shelly handed him a never-ending list of chores. If he didn't complete them to her liking and in a timely manner, he would be punished. He eventually lost his belongings, his pillow, his blanket, then his bed. In time, he wasn't even able to shower. Even though both of the older No-Tech sisters grew to love Shane as a brother, nikki is the one who would quickly become his closest confidant. You see, nikki bore the brunt of Shelly's abuse for years prior to Shane moving in. With a No-Techs Discipline that's what Shelly called it she would grab any item within her reach to hit her daughters when she perceived they had done something wrong. Oftentimes the girls had no idea of the offense. Shelly's excitement grew when she found new punishments that hurt more. She began to attack the girls at night, sometimes dragging them into the cold night air. This happened so often Nikki and Sammy learned to sleep with layers of clothes on. The verbal insults of you fucking little bitch, you fucking loser, you make me sick were followed by physical assaults, often ending in blood. Nikki's survival instinct was to run, which fueled Shelly's rage. During a particularly brutal beating, nikki attempted to escape out of her bedroom. Her mother grabbed her arm and threw her up against a wall into a protruding nail. The nail stuck into Nikki's adolescent head, finally, ending that abusive tirade. Shelly loved to play psychological games as well. She would lavish the girls with gifts on birthdays and Christmas, then take them away, citing bad behavior. Those same presence would be stored in closets, allowing the girls to know where they were. Shelly would lay a trap around them. That way, if her daughters attempted to play with her toys without her knowledge, she would easily be able to tell and implement a brutal punishment, a practice we learned with her adult victims. Shelly would take away shower privileges and even toileting privileges To use a bathroom. Permission had to be granted, but none of that was the worst punishment. Shelly's favorite go-to was wallowing. Wallowing happened outside at night, no matter the temperature or season. Shelly's loud voice would break the silence of slumber as she turned on the bedroom lights while yelling at Nikki to get up, take off her clothes and go downstairs. First outside Shelly, within squats in the mud, naked, shivering and crying. She was then subjected to Dave spraying her with a garden hose while Shelly hurled insults at her. Both parents would scream for Nikki to wallow, like the pig she was. The wallowing would last anywhere from 20 minutes to hours in duration. When her mother was appeased, she would bring Nikki into the bathroom and fill the tub with only hot water. Nikki would be commanded to bathe herself, despite the scalding temperature. Throughout all of this, sammy would watch helplessly from her bedroom window, crying all the while. I mentioned earlier that Nikki suffered the brunt of the abuse. That didn't mean Sammy went without it's just. Her punishments paled in comparisons to her sisters, although it was never fully understood why. They believed it was because of Nikki's need to run or fight back. Sammy would comply with punishments and even try to align herself with her abuser. Another punishment was locking the girls away. Sammy would get one to two days in her bedroom, while Nikki would have multiple days in a closet. It actually became a time of respite for Nikki. She was away from her mother's verbal and physical abuse, diving into the library of books in the closet with her, nikki would escape into the stories of Nancy Drew and author Dean Koontz. When released from the confines of the closet, nikki soon became Shelly's focus again. One occasion when she ran through the kitchen from her screaming mother, nikki was shoved through the glass door. Initially, shelly began accusing Nikki of causing her own fate until she noticed the shards of glass in her daughter's skin and blood dripping from the wounds. She apologized. Then, taking her to the bathroom to gingerly clean her up. Shelly apologized again. Following the incident, shelly treated Nikki to getting her hair done and dinner. Afterward it was just the two of them, a memory Nikki remembered. Into adulthood, shane and Nikki would discuss Shelly's behavior together, both longing for the kind of mother they saw on television. Nikki would mention how she thought Shelly would sometimes make them feel loved. This behavior is common in abusive relationships. The offender follows abuse with acts of kindness and is even able to feign love. The performance pulls a victim in confusing their emotions. They learn to enjoy and look forward to the good times, so much so they may even attempt to improve their own behavior to garner praise. Despite their futile attempts, the cycle of abuse typically continues, strengthening the trauma bond between victim and abuser, and Shelly was a master at manipulating that cycle. Everyone who lived in the Notec home soon learned there was no limit to what she would do. By combining verbal, psychological and emotional abuse with humiliation and physical abuse, shelly strengthened her position of power. Shane was subjected to wallowing alone, but also at times with Nikki, instilling an elevated level of shame. Shelly tried out a new punishment Cousins Shane and Nikki were forced to strip down and slow dance with each other nude in the middle of the living room, in front of the two younger girls and sometimes in front of Dave. It was amid this abuse that Shelley brought Kathy into the home. To hear full details of the horror Kathy endured, refer to Episode 24. I briefly mentioned in that episode how Shane would be forced to hit, punch or kick Kathy as part of her punishments. If he didn't comply, he would be forced to dance with Nikki, wallow or get duct tape to the wall while naked. There were times when Shane couldn't bear it anymore. He would run away Each time, despite missing her sidekick. Nikki would hope he wouldn't be found, but he always was. In February 1995, shelley and Dave informed the girls their cousin had run away. Shelley even explained how Shane had left a gift and a loving note for her. While this made the girls suspicious, they did not want to think that something terrible had happened to him. Instead, the story was Shane was on Kodiak Island working on a fishing boat. He conveniently called when the girls were not home. With Shane gone, nikki once again became the focus. She endured the same treatment as Kathy and Shane, being forced to complete the endless number of chores she would work outside during all hours, all seasons, all in her underwear. Once she graduated high school, shelley demanded Nikki find a job Now. Nikki was nearly as big as Shelley and had quite enough. She yelled back. She ran from Shelley. On one occurrence she shoved Shelley off her and screamed for her to fuck off. Running from her, nikki took off through the house, proudly announcing to Sammy that she had told their mother to fuck off. A few days later, shelley approached Nikki and told her she would be going to Canada to stay with Dave's sister, trish, for 10 days. Shelley explained her behavior was making Sammy uncomfortable. Trish was virtually a stranger to Nikki. Nikki had never taken a trip alone before either. Nervous, but looking forward to getting out of the house, nikki made the trip and told her aunts that she suffered from abuse at home. Trish arranged for Nikki to stay and helped her find work. Nikki never returned home. Six-year-old Tori was distraught. Her biggest sister was gone. Her sadness, however, was soon replaced with terror, as Shelley began abusing her as well, because eventually Sammy was out of the house too. Sammy always somehow able to talk their mother into things was able to convince Shelley to allow her to go to college. Tori was now alone and the sole focus. Controlling bathroom privileges, taking clothes away and inflicting physical pain were regular occurrences. But Shelley introduced a new torture too. She would make pre-teen Tori strip down. Then Shelley would meticulously examine her breasts and vagina for signs of puberty and guys. I could go on with varying disgusting details of abuse on each of Shelley's victims, but to be honest, I don't want to anymore. You're probably wondering where does this story lead, and I don't think any of us should wait another minute. Lara Watson, just to remind you Lara is Shelley's stepmother was retired and living in Oregon in 2001. Nikki had reached out and mentioned she wanted to find a new job there. Lara immediately welcomed her granddaughter. One evening in July, while the two were watching crime shows, nikki blurted that Shelley and David killed Kathy. The next day, lara contacted the police, who asked her to fax Nikki's three-page story to Deputy Jim Bergstrom. They did just that and waited for instructions on the next step. There were no next steps. In March of 2002, deputy Bergstrom notified Lara the investigation was at a standstill as he had not yet received a callback from Sammy. Let's go back to the no Tech Home In order to give Dave time to dispose of Ron's body, and his story is in Episode 25,. Shelley arranged for Tori to spend time with Sammy in Seattle. It was July 2003 when the mother and her two daughters met at Olive Garden. After an uncomfortable lunch, sammy and Tori drove away. Sammy informed her younger sister they would be visiting with Nikki the next day. It had been years since young Tori had seen her oldest sister. During that time, shelley filled her with stories of how evil Nikki was. Despite her nerves anticipating the reunion, tori trusted Sammy and went along. It was an emotional and amazing event. The three sisters immediately reinforced their bond. The following day, sammy and Tori returned to Seattle. Still giddy about their meeting, the two sisters continued to gab while doing laundry. Sammy casually brought up how their mother used to wake her up in the middle of the night by dumping her drawers of clothes onto the floor. Tori quietly replied the same was done to her With trepidation. Sammy pressed the conversation. She didn't want to hear the truth, but she needed to know if Tori was okay. To Sammy's dismay, as Tori continued, she learned their mother had not changed the topic, progressed to talking about Ron, then Kathy. Sammy had previously believed Tori was safe and unharmed. Tori believed the abuse started with her and Ron. Once the two sisters purged their stories they held each other and cried. Around 2 am. Sammy came to the conclusion she could no longer remain impassive to the past. Her little sister's well-being was at stake. Ignoring the late hour, she called Nikki. The siblings began to devise a plan, needing time to carry it out. Tori had to return to Shelley and pretend nothing was amiss, while having to act out the role of her lifetime 14-year-old. Tori was also tasked with finding evidence of Ron's abuse and possible murder. She was able to find the bloody bandages used for Ron's feet and scooped a handful of dirt over the old burn pile. Then she hid the evidence and waited. The two older sisters were busy as well. On August 6, 2003, they visited the sheriff to address Nikki's previously opened case. This time the girls were believed. The next morning Deputy Bergstrom and Child Protective Services arrived at the no Tech Home. They only told Shelley they were there to collect Tori due to concern for child abuse. When the deputy accompanied Tori to her room to gather her belongings, she whispered how he needed a search warrant to come back. She informed him of evidence she believed her parents would burn but also told him of what she had hidden away. Back at the police station, tori, nervous she could still get sent back to her mother, only told investigators about 10% of her abuse. With everything told to them by the three sisters and Lara, there was still not enough evidence to make an arrest. Concerned for his daughter drove Dave to visit the Pacific County Sheriff's Office. Knowing he did not abuse his daughter, he consented to an interview, but there were no questions asked regarding Tori. They interrogated him on Kathy and Ron. Eventually Dave broke down On what would have been Kathy Loreno's 45th birthday. He told them how he had disposed of her and Ron's bodies. Shelly and Dave were arrested. When investigators drove Dave back to the no Tech property, they began questioning about locations of incidents and evidence, without police mentioning Shane, dave suddenly admitted he was killed as the two wrestled for a rifle. It later came out that Dave shot Shane in the back of the head in February 1995 at the coercion of Shelley. She was convinced he was going to go to the police regarding Kathy. While Dave cooperated with the police throughout the investigation, he would not testify against his wife. In February 2004, he pleaded guilty to unlawful disposal of human remains and rendering criminal assistance, as well as second-degree murder of Shane Watson. He was sentenced to just under 15 years in prison. Shelley, on the other hand, entered an Alfred plea. An Alfred plea is a way the defendant pleads guilty to charges without actually admitting guilt Super confusing, but it saves going through the motions of a trial. When entering her plea, shelley agreed to 17 years in prison. At her sentencing, shelley explained how she was not the abuser. Instead, it was Shane and Nikki. She never admitted guilt to any of her charges. Once the judge heard both sides, he sentenced Shelley to more than 22 years in prison for the second-degree murder of Kathy and for manslaughter and Ron's death. She didn't face worse charges because the evidence could not support first-degree murder. Dave was released from prison in 2016. He attempts to maintain a relationship with his daughters, who view him as a victim too. Speaking of the girls, each of them has forged ahead with beautiful lives. You may be wondering how author Greg Olson was able to get this story chronicled. You may be wondering why Nikki, sammy and Tori agreed to relive their trauma and interview with Olson. The answer is simple Knowing how manipulative and evil their mother is, they wanted to ensure she could never hurt anyone again. And just a heads up on that Michelle No-Tech was released from prison on November 8th 2022. Okay then, we got through it. If you want to read about the No-Tech story in further detail, please pick up If you Tell A True Story Of Murder, family Secrets and the Umbrakeable Bond Of Sisterhood by Greg Olson. While it is written extremely well, it is a difficult book to finish because of all the traumas. I'm going to take it a bit easy with the next episode. Kathy from Episodes 2 and 3, is back to share some insight she has learned over the years that may prove helpful to those healing from domestic abuse relationships. That episode will drop next week. Until then, stay strong and wherever you are in your journey, always remember you are not alone. Find more information, register as a guest or leave a review by going to the website 1and3podcastcom. That's the number 1, i-n the number 3, podcastcom. Follow 1and3 on Instagram, facebook and Twitter at 1and3podcast. To help me out, please remember to rate, review and subscribe. 1and3 is a.5 Pinoy production music written and performed by Tim Crow.